A small window, where I can look outside and smile.
Pretend I am fine when I sit inside my house and look other kid play outside.
Nobody want to play with me, I am not exist.
They play gun, and I put their bullet silently after the play.
I went into my bedroom, I put together my toy and play alone.
I am talking alone, pretend there is someone with me and play with me.
I am not exist, no friend and nobody care.
I am just a child, sitting, talking and do something all alone.
Sleep together with my family, I spend almost all my day at this house.
The house that I can’t say home, a place that keep me warm and protect me from the sun.
The place that I grow up and do a lot of things, a place that never be mine.
Keep us warm, keep us safe.
The final place I will go when my long day was gone.
It will be a memories sooner because I am not longer in here anymore.
When I am a kid, I was really shy to let people know where I am living.
More I grow, more I know what is the important things and not shy anymore.
But, its look too late because now everything was gone.
Didn’t know what I am suppose to feel anymore,
Am I happy that I am finally free ?
Am I sad when all my memories must gone ?
The place where I grow, the place that I finally want to called it home ?
Everything happen really fast, in one day everything start to changes.
I am not ready to say goodbye, I am not ready to leave.
I wanna scream, but there is no voice getting out from my mouth.
I wanna cry, but there is no tear from my eyes.
Like a dream come true, a nightmare dream that I never imagine before.
Try to stay as long as I could,
Try to be strong even there is no power anymore,
Keep smile because tears didn’t save the place,
Keep smile because there is more easier things to do, better than I told the whole story.
Nobody was there,
Nobody know and nobody care.
No matter how older I am now, everything keep being the same.
Like I am not exist anymore.
