Since I was a kid, I never get a daddy love, until today.
Its sad, actually, but that is me, the person that looking for a dad love, but never get it.
Never get any support from him either, I live like nothing but emptiness inside.
I grow in the scare of dad, looking a man like a monster.
Because my dad always rude and like to punch my mom in many ways.
So, I decided to never give a chance to a man, until today.
First I am not beauty and not attractive to man, second, I dont like man either.
I ruin my life 5 years ago and now I am trying to fix everything.
I am scare, I dont want to leave my mom too, but I really want to start something fresh, not like I want it, but I should do it.
Am I gonna regret it ?
Is there gonna be any consequence of that ?
I know it, and willing to take it ?
I dont know which is good or not, but I trust that everything happen will be good because God bless me and protect me.
I know that I am stupid and a liar.
Ruin my own life to the point that I have nobody else left.
To the point that I take the actions and go far away just to get money and left mom.
I wanna start a new fresh, and I really wish that everything will be good.
Am I trusting Lyn more than enough to get there ?
First, I am scare, but I also believe that everything happen is have their reason.
Its not where I am going, because everywhere that I go, dad will not allowed it and saying a rude things for me.
Mom in the other side, saying dont left her but smoothly support me in her conditions as well.
I love my mom more than everything, and its real hard for me to left her.
I just wish, in the pass 1 years, I can comeback to be a new person, finding peace and start everything over again.
Isnt it sad, to left mom ?
But, I am so done to make execuse to my life and really looking foward to make things better in so many ways.
I just wish, God bless and protect me in evert decision that I am about to make, and God protect my mom, and dad so I can meet them again next years, in a better version of me, in a better life.
So, whatever happen, lets it happen and may God bless all the rest.
