From all the people that I know, even the people that I know since 1 SD, there is nobody that come to help when I am asking them. And what hurt most ?
Is they, pretend not to read the text until I keep sending begging emoji and then they reply coldly and not have at all. Its sad, at first and I really didnt have hope and I just can cry when I sleep with my mom and pray to God, saying, “God, please help me get through it all.”
From all the people that I know, I am dare myself to sending text to my uncle son, not expect much because I am hurting my uncle more than much and he become the ONLY ONE who helping me. Hoping there is the last time I am doing that, I really mean it now.
I feel a lot until I feel nothing, but I really know who is deserve to sit with me in the future. I know that I am gonna make it, I will make it. Even it take a real long ride and time, I am gonna make it in the end. The last person that I am not expected to help but help, will be the last time I am doing this circle too.
I get my period and hard to sleep when I am not drinking xanax. I try to fix myself to be better too, and I dont want to let myself down after I think a lot about how to end mylife if there is no rescue at all.
Thanks God, to touch my causin heart and please, help me get out from this hole.
I get the shovel, and I will dig pretty hard my way out.
The only one who can save me is me, I want to keep a positive mind and let God bless the rest of it too.
Its not gonna be easy, but every step and every event that happen may bring the good lesson in my life.
Wish that I can get more than great future. Keep doing it, until I make it.
