Am I gonna make it to pass my 33 ? I am wonder.
I sending text to my ako and quangming, and I dont think they will respond or help anymore. I am not suprise, but at least I text them in the end.
I only can give back 100k cash in dad pocket. Fenny is also mad and not care anymore about me. My friend from childhood ? They pretend they didnt see my text until I keep sending it and they reply it very simple and hurtful too.
30k in my pocket, 30k in my bank. A debts coming soon, and I just dont know what to do with my life anymore. Its already ruin, and I dont know how to fix it to be better. I have a lot of idea in my head about to have a shop, calling dome space.
Its seem its just in my head. How can I make it happen, for living itself, its so hard and hurtful. I am mess myself, I think I am gonna do and make it better, but I just do it wrong, again and again.
I dont want to hurt dad and bro more than what its already been. Escape with stole phone and some cash from dad ? I am not gonna do that. I just dont want to do that, and I think, living this life and them is a better choices because I not get to see them sad and disappointed anymore.
6 day before I am turning into 33 people. I dont think that I am gonna make it. I pray to God to let me get through all of it, and I just dont know anymore. In this some spare time of life, I think all I wanna do is sleep and hug mom.
Mom can forget and think that I am just get out for a while. Brother can move on for sure, and dad ? He may be a more good to mom too.
I am just a mess person that beyond to be fix. I just, dont have any will to live this life anymore.
Is that gonna be a miracle in my life ?
The miracle that can change my whole life ?
I dont know anymore, because I am so tired to living this life.
