A very long time,
Didnt sit with coffee and laptop while writing some poet.
Trusting people much, care a lot and hurt most.
Still didnt believe what happen 1 hours ago,
Still feel the pain, all the tear inside my heart.
What I am gonna do and feel lately then ?
Nobody really care, nobody really there.
Am I allowed to be mad ?
Am I allowed to saying what I am really feel inside ?
I dont know, I am tired to be a person that make other people happy.
I wanna be me, just me.
Pretend to be happy, pretend to be OK.
Well, I am not.
I am not at all.
I lose everything, and that is OK to lose one or two more things again.
Include person that I think I want to spend my day with.
Tired, I wanna run away and hide.
Oh, no…
I am also tired about hiding.
I wanna die, I just wanna left this body.
When I think people care, well they’re not.
When I am happy for some calling, thinking they’re care.
Well, they also not.
They just want to know about the job, it is done or not.
Sitting alone, spending a night alone.
Drink my cold coffee, try to put a puzzle and piece together.
Its been a really long time, that I am not love myself more.
Its been a really long time, that I am not happy like I am use to be too.
I am mad,
I am disappointed.
I am what I am today,
Because I feel every pain, keep fight and survive.
Keep try to breath and keep fix what I am broken.
I am mad,
Not in people around me.
Its me and only me.
Try hard to forgive myself, and believe that everything gonna be OK.
